Falling in Love

You're not going to believe this but I've fallen in love with my house again. It's amazing what a little sweat and a fresh coat of paint will do. I find myself exclaiming OH I LOVE MY HOUSE at really random moments. And it's true, I do. Anyway, I don't think I told you about this:

I'm sure I've mentioned before that the person who owned our home before us was a brick layer and whenever he had leftover brick he just built things with it. Hence, we had a brick box in our kitchen that could serve no purpose other than house our enormous microwave. Another similarly useless thing he built was this brick square that sat in our front yard. Apparently, he meant for it to be a post for a light fixture but he never bothered to run conduit through it or anything sensible like that. So, Tom borrowed Alex's sledgehammer and went to it with a little help from the guys.

Here is a picture of Dean priming the new trim in our dining room. Here is a picture of Jack staining our TV cabinet a deep, rich brown to match the rest of the furniture in the living room. He did an awesome job.

This is me filling all the nail holes in the new trim in our living room , prepping for paint. You can also see the color our living room walls used to be and in this photo it's not too bad. In person it's almost highlighter yellow. This is also me without makeup. I'm just keeping it real, yo.Here are the boys enjoying a rare moment off from work.

And here is a picture of the boys relaxing on our new couch. You can also see the new color on the living room walls - a soft gray with white trim. I LOVE IT.

I had hoped to have pictures hung and everything put away nice and neat before posting photos but just haven't had time. I have the day off tomorrow and intend on cleaning up the kitchen, putting away all the odds and ends, fixing up the living room a bit and then, finally I will take pictures of everything and post them here. I still don't have curtains but am slightly afraid to go shopping for them again for fear I'll pick out a new bedroom set.

What? It could happen.

A Load Off

• 3:30am. That's when I finally went to bed. Sheesh.
  
• I just sent an email to the current President to tell her I'm flattered but I cannot be President for the next term.
• Corned beef is in the crock pot. Hope it's good.
• Got Keynote but don't see what the big deal is. It's just like powerpoint but on a mac.
• Got candy and flip flops for the boys' Easter basket. Need to find the plastic eggs at home.
• Still love the color of my living room walls.
• Adore my new furniture.
  

The Ramblings of a Crazy Person

I can't sleep. Too full on corned beef, cupcakes and coffee. We went to the Sullivans for dinner tonight and it was delicious. But, after 2 glasses of wine I thought it would be a good idea to have a cup of coffee and, well, I should have known better. Still, after days and days of subsisting on 5-6 hours of sleep each night I really didn't think one little cup of coffee was going to keep me up tonight. That's what I get for thinking. So here's a sampling of what's rattling around in my head right now.

1. Crap! Easter is on Sunday and I haven't gotten anything for the boys yet. Must do that at lunch this week.
2. I still need to get curtains for the kitchen and figure out what we're going to do with the dining room window.
3. I had a dream about Heather Armstrong last night. That's weird.
4. I'm thirsty.
5. Work stuff. Maybe I should get Keynote to help me brainstorm our space restructure? Will request from resources tomorrow.
   
6. Oh! I skipped my resources meeting today and didn't call them. Must call them.
7. Can I make corned beef in the crock pot?
   
8. I have to make a decision about curtains in the living room, too.
   
9. Wow, I really love the color of my living room.
10. I need to start running again. I'm worried about my knees though which didn't much like all that bending down I was doing to paint the living room.
11. The Mother's Day Brunch is coming up soon and I need to request a donation from work this week.
    
12. SFVMOMC wants to nominate me for President for the next term. I don't want to be President but feel guilty about that.
    
13. I can't be President! I am already way over scheduled and that doesn't even include activities for the boys! And they start school in the fall. What if I want to join the PTA?
14. How much of a time commitment is it, really? It's only two Tuesdays a month. How bad could it be?
15. There's also two State conventions each year that the President has to attend. And not just the fun part - the boring meetings, too! And, the President has to go to every single function from the Get Acquainted Teas to the holiday parties, skate party, and every other event there is. And don't get me started about the financial responsibility of being in charge of a non-profit organization.
    
16. But there's already such a strong executive board in place for the next term. And, I'd have the strongest Parliamentarian ever because she's been a member for years and past President several times.
17. Absolutely not. Kelsi, you cannot take this on.
18. I'm still not sleepy.
19. I am still thirsty.
20. I love my new couch.
    

Weekend Highlights

Gosh it seems like ages since we last talked! Please do note the time. It is late on a Sunday night and I think this is perhaps the first time I have sat down all day. Maybe all weekend. It's been a busy one. At last I'm sitting in my brand new chair and I have to say, it's doing right by me.

This has been one heckuva long week prepping for the arrival of the furniture. Starting with the systematic removal of the old furniture, prepping walls for paint, painting, painting and painting some more. Then? Another coat, just for good measure. And while we have the brushes out are there any other spots that need to be touched up? Hey! Let's paint the door! And the threshold! Oh, let's paint Kelsi tired.

Some highlights from the weekend that didn't have to do with painting - we took the boys to see Horton Hears a Who. That was fun and I got to sit down for almost 2 hours! We went to Peter & Julian's for breakfast this morning. We had homemade blueberry pancakes, l'il smokies, and egg and potato scramble with fresh squeezed orange juice. So good. And about a hundred espressos. I used my kitchen aid stand mixer for the first time on Friday night. That was fun. I cut Tom's hair.

Ok, so enough about that stuff. I love my new furniture! While the boys spent a few hours at their friend Frank's house, we rearranged the furniture. It feels good. It's open and inviting and just the right amount of pieces. I took some pictures but I'm too tired to post them. But I will soon. And I'll also post pictures of the kitchen soon even if we don't have curtains on the windows. You've waited long enough.

Heartburn

Dean: Ohhh, my heart is burning.
Me: Why?
Dean: Because of Amanda (teacher at school).
Me: Your heart is burning because of Amanda?
Dean: Yes because she sings such beautiful songs.

Our Dean the romantic.



Happy Birthday Eddie!!!!

MarBlo and Lists

So, I had every intention of trying to post every day in the month of March but here it is March 2nd and I've already missed a day.

I also had every intention of posting pictures of the kitchen today but it isn't quite finished. Tom touched up the paint in a few places and it looks great. He still has to install the lighting in the dining room and then we still need curtains for the kitchen window and the dining room window. We had every intention of getting the curtains today - it was on our list - really the only reason we went out today. In fact, our list went something like this:

curtains for kitchen and dining room
look at lighting

We purchased lighting and new living room furniture.

Do you see living room furniture on that list? No. But, Macy's was having a sale and it ended today and we fell in love. I mean, so in love. And it will be delivered on 3/16 so now we need to pick paint for the living room and paint it before the new furniture gets here. I'm not going to describe it though. I'll take a picture after it gets delivered and you can see for yourself. And I promise I won't drag it out like I am the kitchen. Two weeks from today - you'll see it.

Patience Please

Nope. You'll have to wait a bit longer for the pictures of the final outcome of the kitchen project. We still have a few more things to put away. I'm shooting for Saturday. Pictures on Saturday and maybe I'll post on Sunday morning. So, stay tuned.
Tonight's entry is a public exhalation. A virtual sigh, if you will. An acknowledgment that the last few weeks have been really tough but I'm on the other side of it. Ironically, not because of the kitchen but rather other problems that I've had to work out in my head. Don't worry, everything's fine. The family is great, life is good - even with the construction and the chaos. It's just that sometimes, there are things that you need to work out in your own head. And your partner or you friend can listen to you and even offer advice but ultimately, you're the one who has to decide how you want to handle your problem. And that's where I've been. One of my new favorite slogans is "everything is a passing memory". Nothing is permanent. The pain or anger or frustration that I was feeling was a passing memory - it's already gone. And every time the fear popped up in my mind, I reminded myself that it was simply a passing memory and the anxiety faded. So, this post is all about me feeling at peace with myself and my newfound tool for redirecting my focus so I can let go of the things that weigh me down.
Everything is a passing memory. My new mantra.

Oh! The Suspense!

Oh the pictures are coming, don't you worry. It's just that I decided to wait a bit until everything is put back together before I post the pictures. Call it an unveiling if you will. Or, in reality television, it's called The Reveal. There are still a few little things to do. Plumbing the sink, for instance. Oh, that's a big one and it's in process. After that, the new light fixture goes in and then we'll begin to put the room back together. We're close, so close.

As you know, we've had to do a lot of eating out due to this project. Luckily, Jack and Dean have demonstrated that they are delightful dining companions and I can honestly say that every outing with them has been not just bearable but enjoyable. Even when it's been just me and them.

Alright, well Tom just walked in the door with a bag full of In 'N Out burgers so off I go.

More later...

Polishing it off

They've been working on installing my countertop now for the last 2 hours. The first two pieces went on so easy - POP! and there they were. But the other piece, the big piece with the sink? Not so simple. Our walls? They are not square. No, no, no. They are decidedly unsquare. They had to shave off a bit here, sand off a bit there. A bit more here and a bit more there. A shimmy and a shake. More shaving and sanding. Finally, that sucker went in. And now they're sanding and polishing the top so its purty. And it is. It is purty. I like it. I can't wait to put the new pulls on the cabinets and clean all the shelves and connect the plumbing for the sink and wash all my dishes and put everything back in the cabinets and on top of the cabinets and vacuum my floor and remove the pile 'o crap from my dining table which is in the middle of the living room blocking the boys' most precious toys and generally driving me crazy with all the clutter and chaos!
I seriously thought all that in my head with only one breath.
But, I must be patient because there is so much to do before that can be done.
First, Kate needs some attending to. She was spayed one week ago today and her incision is looking a bit weepy so off to the vet we go. As soon as these nice gentlemen leave.
Pictures of my beautiful new countertop will be forthcoming.

Addendum: Kate's fine. The vet says her incision is healing beautifully and that she doesn't need to wear the cone anymore. And that's good because she could not figure out how to navigate with that thing on her head. I can't tell ya how many times she has run into a door jamb or a wall and just stopped and stood there because she couldn't figure out what stopped her.

Quick Kitchen Update

The interruption in programming is due to extreme busyness at work punctuated by chaotic, dustyness (new word?) at home. I have updates to share but not enough time to download the pictures. I painted the ceiling in the kitchen on Sunday and did the walls yesterday morning. All it needs now is the countertop and that is being installed tomorrow. WOO HOO! I cannot wait to clean my cabinets and put everything back in!
I painted the dining room yesterday and realized we picked the wrong color. After I got 2 coats on it. Boo Hoo. It's a pretty color but it's too close to the kitchen color so it's too much of the same darn color. Ah well.

More to come . . .

Weekend playtime

We had really nice weather last weekend and the boys wanted to go swimming. This was the best we could do on short notice.

Six Steps and a Long Term Goal

As I promised here, I am outlining today what I plan to do in response to Lotus' challenge to contribute to the cleaning up of the planet (or at least my tiny part of it).

1. I will keep a trash bag and gloves in my car so I never have an excuse to not pick up trash when I see it.
2. I will walk a lap around the track after my run in the morning and pick up all the trash I see.
3. I will continue buying my fruits and vegetables from local farmers at my Farmer's Market.
4. I will make a conscious effort to buy other grocery items (such as meat and dairy) from within a 100 mile radius of where I live.
   
5. I will use those cool mesh bags for my produce that I saw here.
6. Once a month, I will take the boys to the park/beach/hiking and pick up trash while they play.
7. I have a long term goal to grow a vegetable garden so I can be somewhat self-sustaining but it may have to wait for a different yard.

I think that's a good start, right?

More about the kitchen

Here's where we left off, right? There was a door in the middle of our dining room. In years past, there used to be a wall that ran from the kitchen to that door and to the right of that door, was a laundry room. To the left was the dining room. Back then, it probably made sense to have a door there. I guess. Anyway, someone tore that wall down and left the door there. It was on our to-do list when we moved into the house and here we are, 6 1/2 years later, doing it.

And here it is, done. The taping, plastering, sanding, replastering, sanding, etc. is being done today. As promised, cabinets and appliances were re-installed yesterday and we finally begin to see how it will all work together.

In other news, I'm ridiculously stressed out about work (shouldn't be doing this now but procrastinating the real stuff) and starting to have the free-floating anxiety again. Woo hoo. Hives will be showing up any minute. Because, you know how that helps the stress level.

Charlie Bit Me

Go see this video because it cracked me up! I am amazed though that the older brother handled himself so well.

Charlie

A Floor!

The tile was laid on Monday so we went to dinner and a movie right after work so we wouldn't be tempted to walk on our new floor. We were pretty excited when we got home and saw how it looked. I couldn't wait to see how it would look with grout!


The boys were really happy to get to walk on the floor again. Dean said it was perfect for making snow angels. Wha??? Anyway, we love the color of the grout. I think it's the perfect sandy, dirty color so it will disguise the real dirt once we start using the kitchen again.

The cabinets and appliances go back in today and the company comes out on Friday to do the template for our countertop.



Also today? That door comes out and the wall gets framed in! I can't wait to see it tonight!!

Hidden Costs

of a kitchen remodel:

Thursday
Millies = $48.00

Friday
Hot's Cantina = $36.00
Penguins = $12.00

Saturday
Starbucks = $8.00
Jamba Juice = $14.00
Sizzler = $30.00

Sunday
Starbucks = $8.00
KFC = $30.00

Monday
Parking at Citywalk = $5.00
Nameless Pizza Place = $20.00
Movie Tickets = $37.00

Ultimately, the cost to our health is probably worse than the pain in our wallets. I can't wait to cook in my new kitchen!!

Dear Dean Letter

Cleaning out cabinets in preparation for demo/construction, Tom found a postcard given to Dean by one of the girls from the daycare who went to Kindergarten in Fall '07. Perhaps you recall the postcard that she wrote to Jack? This is Dean's:

Dean,

Thank you Dean for letting your brother be nice to me. I still love you.

T---

Kitchen Update

This is what we came home to on Thursday night. All appliances and base cabinets were removed and the kitchen was down to the sub floor. Most of the electrical work was done with the addition of 4 outlet boxes on the stove/fridge wall (seen below) and 3 outlet boxes on the sink wall.

Look at these beautiful boys amid the devastation!

Ok, then we got home on Friday night. All the electrical was complete, including 2 new outlet boxes in the dining room and 2 new phone jacks - one in the kitchen and one in the living room. Makes a big difference since we won't have to have phone line threaded all over the house! The drywall was in place and the arduous task of tape, plaster, dry, sand, repeat - had begun. The wonderboard is on the floor ready for tile. The cabinets are in place but not installed yet. It's supposed to rain this weekend so it's too risky to store the cabinets outside as we have been. So that's the latest. We have a birthday party to go to soon and then we'll go look at tile for the wall behind the stove. Jack desperately wants to clean and dust (me too) but we're making him wait until the construction is done. The work is stalled until Monday so no updates until Tuesday!

Holy Gutted Kitchen Batman!

Love is in the Air

I know a lot of people think that Valentine's Day is a fake holiday made up by Hallmark but some folks need a dedicated day to remind them to say 'hey, I love you' or something romantic like that. If you're in need of a unique or great gift for your loved one, take a look at Mighty Goods 2008 Valentine's Day Gift Guide. While you're there, check out the awesome alternatives to Hallmark Valentine's Day Cards.

One Step for Nature

When you get a chance, go read this post by Lotus of SarcasticMom. Look for my post on February 11th that will outline the contribution I intend to make to Project Support Beauty in Nature.

What will you do?

Observations and Conversations

Jack has an accent laced with an East LA inflection. He says words like 'ghostes' instead of 'ghosts', 'lello' instead of 'yellow', 'weally' instead of 'really', etc. He calls me 'ma MEEEE' with the emphasis on MEEEEE. His favorite exclamation word is 'awe SOME' with the emphasis on some. His favorite color is still red but he will wear other colors now.

Dean has a valley accent. He says 'o-kah' instead of 'okay'. He uses the word 'like' all the time. Like, all the time. His diction is otherwise perfect and includes the proper tense usage. And, in fact, sometimes includes correcting his brother. Which is always welcome (NOT). He often uses his eyebrows to emphasize his point. Furrowed = mad. Raised = inquisitive. He will not wear long sleeved shirts.

Conversation between Jack and Dean this morning:
Dean: When are we going to get to wear braces?
Jack: What are braces?
Dean: They're special teeth that you put in your mouth.

Conversation between me and Jack last night:
Jack: Well? Did you know? That there's a new baby at the daycare? And the parents? Well, they call him a bad name.
Me: Really? What's his name?
Jack: Well, they call him Gun.
Me: Oh, that's short for Gunnar.
Jack: Well, it's a bad name.

Conversation between me, Jack and Dean last night:
Dean: Did you know we have another Katie at the daycare?
Me: You do?
Jack: Yes, now we have two Katies.
Me: How old is the new Katie?
Jack: Well, Katie is 3.
Dean: Yeah, one of the Katies is 3.
Me: Is that the old Katie or the new Katie?
Dean: Well, the new Katie is 8 I think.
Jack: No! She's 7.
Dean: Yeah, right. She's 7.
Me: So, is that Katie who has a sister named Sarah?
Dean: Yeah, right.
Me: She's the Katie who came to the daycare last week?
Dean: Right.
Me: But she doesn't go to the daycare anymore. She used to go there. She was just visiting.
Jack/Dean: Yeah, right.
Me: So who's the new Katie?
Them: She's 3.
Me: The Katie who was just at Callum's birthday party last weekend?
Them: Right.
Me: So besides that Katie, is there another Katie at the daycare?
Them: NO.
Me (to myself): Glad we got that cleared up.

Dean

Just a quick note today about Dean. I feel like I've been a bit down about him lately. Only posting negative reports about him and frequently complaining about him. We actually had a very nice weekend and he was pretty good. Oh, except for Friday night . . . I'm just now remembering how he was in Target (NIGHTMARE) but otherwise, an angel. No really, some of it is our fault. We know how he is with change (not good) and we know how sensitive he is (extremely) and yet some part of us still thinks we can get away with a quick trip to Target on a Friday night at 8:30pm to buy a birthday present for Jack's best friend and have Dean be all mature and compliant. Ahem.
Saturday morning brought us a new day though of good-natured boys who were, for the most part, good to each other and well-behaved. Or maybe, this is just the view through my hindsight goggles. Whatever. I'm remembering the sweet moments with Dean. The moments when he looped his arms around my neck and his babysoft, cool hands touched my cheeks and he looked at me with those deep brown eyes that look into my soul . . . what a wonder. That boy who is by turns all piss and vinegar and then the sideways wry smile, the knock knock joke, the unprompted 'I love you mama' melts my heart and all is forgiven.

Updates and Photos

To make up for my long absence from regular posting, here are some pictures for you! My brother was in town recently for business and we managed to get together for a quick dinner. Jack was suddenly very shy but Dean warmed up immediately and proceeded to charm the heck out of Chad. One memorable comment by Dean to Chad was, "You're hilarious! How did you get so hilarious? I didn't know you were so hilarious." I think Chad thought that was, well . . . hilarious!


Here, Chad is showing Dean how to do the Rock 'n Roll handshake. At the next table were some hard core rockers with black smudges under their eyes, tattoos, black fingernail polish and brightly colored hair. We had to show 'em how hip we are!


I haven't posted a picture of Kate in a while so here she is with her absolute favorite thing: her frisbee. She's still really sweet and eager to please. I'm looking into obedience training for her to start sometime in February. The training isn't for her as much as it is for me! She already knows sit, down, and paw but I want to make sure she comes to me when I call her - especially since she takes off if an opportunity presents!


This is Dean with Kate in our kitchen before I took a sledgehammer to it. Note the brick "thing" on the left? I hated that thing.

Here's Jack in the space where that brick thing once stood. He was my big helper. I knocked that thing down and he moved every bit of mortar, pieces of brick, etc. to the wheelbarrow parked just outside. He loved when large pieces came apart. He was my biggest cheerleader, best helper and absolutely tireless. He wouldn't take a break until I took one and hardly even wanted to eat in case he missed something. Don't worry about the missing shoes in the following photos. I shop vacced that whole place and picked up every stray nail or screw. Seriously, it's cleaner now than when the linoleum was on it.

See that door behind Jack? That will be removed and filled in. Who needs a door in the dining room?
And the view from the dining room looking through the kitchen towards the entryway. That countertop is on it's last breath. I can't wait to take the hammer to it this weekend! Yee haw!!Doncha want to eat Jack up in that photo? He looks like a little gingerbread man to me. I just want to nibble him! He's got a few tricks up his sleeve lately. The other day he was taking a bath and he washed his hair and body by himself, let the water out of the tub, got out and dried himself and then got dressed without my even knowing it. Yesterday morning while I was in the shower he got dressed for school, dragged the chair into the kitchen so he could reach the cereal, dragged the chair to the cupboard to get a bowl, took the milk out of the fridge and poured himself a bowl of cereal with milk. At school they tell me that he's the first to wash hands and wait at the table with his hands folded, patiently waiting for all the other kids to sit down to eat. He loves to sweep and does all the sweeping at the daycare. One day a parent commented to his teacher about what a great job he was doing and his teacher replied, "He's been doing this since he was 3!" He tells me that Jack does an exceptional job and doesn't miss even a grain of sand. Jack has a best friend at school and they spend every waking moment together. He told me he wants to move in with him and be his brother. And I found out that this boy's mother packs 2 of everything in a lunch whenever they have field trips - one for him and one for Jack. It's so sweet.

Dean is still a handful of drama. He's afraid of everything - windows, doors and (I found out today) chimneys. He doesn't want to go to the bathroom by himself or even go into the kitchen by himself! It's enough to make me crazy! Jack is kind enough to point out windows, doors and chimneys, thankyouverymuchjack, and Dean cries and clings until I finally give in and hold him. I'm trying to be all rational but clearly this isn't a rational fear and I'm sure he'll grow out of it soon. I've also been concerned about Dean because he's so quick to anger and his gut reaction is to hit, bite, push, etc. Every day I remind him to be kind with his words and kind with his body and still nearly every day there is some incident that happened at school in which he had to be removed from the group for some period of time. The teachers are all very nice and they don't "punish". The worst thing they ever do is remove the child from the situation. So it's my nightly practice to check in with his teacher to see how he was that day. In our chat last night I expressed my concern that when he enters kindergarten in the fall that he's going to get in a lot of trouble. His teacher told me that he thinks he'll be better when he's with all 5 year olds and that most of the time, it's his love-hate relationship with a 3 year old boy in the daycare that gets him in trouble. The other times he gets in trouble is when he is defending one of the younger girls in the daycare! His teacher told me that all the kids love Dean and he generally picks who he wants to play with each day and they do whatever he wants them to do. He told me that Dean would be fine and that his teacher is going to love him because he's so charming.

Finally, I asked him how Jack and Dean interact at school and he said that for the most part, they don't. Usually, the only time they do is if one of them is sick or upset then the other one will comfort him. Usually, the one needing the comfort is Dean and Jack does the comforting. His teacher said he loves to watch the way they come together when they need to but are otherwise completely independent.

As always, it's busy, chaotic, demanding and frustrating here at twintales but I wouldn't change it for the world.

Demolition Girl

Sorry to be so MIA. I've been a little preoccupied. I demo'd my kitchen yesterday. Pulled up all the linoleum, steamed the wallpaper off the dining room (that was Sunday, actually), removed the tile from the countertop next to the stove, took a sledgehammer to the built-in brick thing that was next to my stove and removed the brick (yes, brick) backsplash. My hands are raw, my back is aching, my fingernails are falling apart but boy was that fun! Jack was my little assistant. He carried all the linoleum and wallpaper bits and pieces to the garbage can. He filled the wheelbarrow with broken tile, mortar and brick pieces. That kid was absolutely tireless. I'll take some pictures tonight and try to post them soon. The countertop installer comes next Wednesday to measure and do the template. Then it will be another 5-7 days before it will be installed. So, by Valentine's Day I should have a new kitchen!!

Saucy

I went to a sauce class on Tuesday night. This was the second class that I took from the gift certificate that Tom gave me for my birthday. She showed us how to make a compound butter, veloute, vinaigrette, bechamel, reduction sauce, and a creme anglais flavored with coffee beans. I went home from that class feeling totally inspired. Wednesday night I made corn chowder with crispy pancetta and golden shrimp for dinner. Okay, seriously it was so amazingly good. Then Thursday night I made cream of mushroom soup and tonight was Pasta al Forno (fancy way of saying mac and cheese). But the best was the corn chowder. Soooooo good. Here's the recipe:

1 T. canola oil
small onion, diced
1/2 C. cubed pancetta (or bacon)
3 T. butter (divided)
2 T. flour
2 C. chicken stock
16 oz. frozen white corn (w/ 1/4 c. reserved)
1 C. milk
1 lb. shrimp, peeled and deveined
Tapatio or Tabasco Sauce
salt and pepper

In a large heavy saucepan over medium heat, add the oil, onion and pancetta. Cook until onion is translucent and pancetta is browned. Add 2 T. butter and cook over medium heat until the butter is melted and sizzling (do not let it burn). Add the flour, whisking constantly until it begins to have a nutty aroma - about 3 minutes. Whisk in the chicken stock. Stir in the corn (except for 1/4 cup) and bring soup to a simmer for 5 minutes or so. Stir in the milk and simmer for another 5-10 minutes. In a separate skillet, melt 1 T. butter and cook the shrimp 1-2 minutes on each side. Remove the shrimp to a clean bowl after it turns a light pink, add the 1/4 cup reserved corn to the skillet and saute for 2 minutes. Chop the shrimp into small pieces and add with the reserved corn to the chowder. Add a couple of dashes of tapatio or tabasco and salt and pepper to taste. Serve with a green salad and crusty bread. Serves 2.

Dean's Five Year Check Up

The day of Dean's check up dawned early - at 5:00am when he came bounding into our room, jumped onto our bed and refused to go back to sleep. He also complained of an earache and was kind of a little pain in the you know what. The day wasn't starting off too well. But, when I picked him up at lunchtime, he seemed fine. Excited, even. Dean requested chinese food for his special lunch so we went to Panda Express. We had fried rice, chow mein, orange chicken (he ate most of it), beef with broccoli and pot stickers. Then we headed over to the doctor. Like Jack, Dean gained 5 pounds and 3.5 inches since last year but he's still 4 pounds less than Jack. Doctor S asked about Dean's eating habits. I told him Dean hasn't changed much from when he was a baby - he still doesn't want to have to stop what he's doing to eat. He's never been able to focus on food. Jack, on the other hand, focuses on food from the moment he wakes up every day. Anyway, the doc isn't concerned since he's clearly growing and is otherwise fine. A quick check in the ear did confirm that he has an ear infection but it didn't stop the vaccinations. Poor Dean. As soon as the nurse came in with the 5 syringes he started crying. And they were short staffed so they couldn't double team him like they did Jack. Soon though it was over and I gave him a shot of motrin right away. We stopped at the little cafe on the way out and Dean chose oreo cookies for his treat. Considering how upset he was, Dean did really well. Later when we got back to the daycare, his teacher told me that he was pretty anxious before I got there. Poor kid was probably worrying about those shots.

Jack's Five Year Checkup

This year, I decided to do their annual exams separately. I did that because last year when I did them at the same time I almost couldn't hold Jack down long enough to get his one required vaccination. He was all ambivalent about the shot until Dean started crying and there was no way in hell Jack was going to volunteer for that. Jack's exam was today and I picked him up early so we could have lunch together, just the two of us. He wanted pancakes so we went to IHOP. I let him have hot chocolate and a miniature Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity (my arteries clog just typing it). It sort of seems like the last meal of a doomed man, right? Right.

Jack wasn't nervous or anything and he seemed happy just to have some one on one time with me, even if it meant he'd have to have a shot. He has gained 5 pounds since his 4 year (normal is 5-7) and grew 3.5 inches (normal is 2). His vision is excellent, blood pressure, heart rate, breathing, etc. - all normal. Doc is pleased and proud - what a success, what luck. Hard to believe he started out at 3 lbs 5 oz and 16 inches.

As I said, last year I almost couldn't hold him down long enough for his shot (singular, one shot). This year, he had to have 4 shots and a TB test. He had a nurse on each arm and they did two shots each in rapid succession.

The kid barely made a sound.

I bought him an ice cream sandwich. Told him he deserved it.

Always with the Questions

Dear Internet,

Jack has lots of questions and it's wearing me out. He's making a list of things that you can make such as, glass (melt sand) and wood (comes from trees) but there are so many other things he wonders about and his mother isn't any help. So, that's where you come in:

1. How do you make gold? Dean thinks you make it by twisting threads together but Jack told him he's wrong.
2. What is the street made out of? And asphalt isn't good enough.
3. How do you make wires?
4. How do you make water? Oh, and don't think you can just answer Hydrogen and Oxygen. Amateur.
5. What else do you know how to do besides cooking? Oh, sorry this was a direct question to me, his mother. But I honestly couldn't think of a thing.

So? Whatcha got?

Lessons from the Weekend

1. Don’t underestimate the power of Chuck E. Cheese’s to entertain the kids for 2 hours thus allowing you the opportunity to talk to your spouse with few interruptions.
2. 4:00pm on a rainy Saturday turns out to be the perfect time to go to Chuck E. Cheese’s. It’s between birthday parties and before the dinner crowd.
3. When your child wants to try to put the K’NEX windmill together by himself and insists he can follow the directions, let him try. He learns nothing from watching you do it for him whereas when he tries to do it himself, what he gains is much bigger than just a windmill.
4. When you go to the roller skating party, don’t be surprised by the number of times your kids fall down. Do be surprised when the one who is usually less physically coordinated, and more likely to get frustrated and give up, turns out to be the better skater.
5. When you lay down with your kids at night and one doesn’t fall asleep soon enough for you, don’t get frustrated and stomp out of the room. But, if you do, take a deep breath, take a sippy cup with water back into the room, give it to the still-awake child and ask him to scoot over. Wrap your arms around him while he sips and tell him how proud of him you are. You will never, ever regret the time you took to let him know how much he is loved.

Memories

I was in the waiting room at the doctor's office this afternoon. As I waited, I leafed through TIME magazine with particular interest in the article on birth order - not surprisingly, it doesn't mention how birth order affects twins. In the chair opposite mine sat an elderly man with a weathered, lined face, his oxygen tank hissing rhythmically. Shh . . shh . . shh . .
He paid no attention to me but I sat across from him deliberately.
He could have been someone else, not in looks but in manner.
A cell phone began to ring and I was surprised that it was his. Why am I surprised?! Why shouldn't he have a cell phone? I don't mean to eavesdrop but I hear him say that he's at the doctor and should be done soon. "What are you doing" he asks and then "can I buy you a sandwich?".
Suddenly, the waiting room goes into soft focus and I remember sitting at McDonald's, having a cup of coffee. I see us sitting at a table, a younger me and Grandpa Jack. I remember the day distinctly. He was still driving then and he drove me around Lafayette and showed me the new construction. He talked about my Grandma and told me how much he missed her. He told me how proud of my Mom he was and of all his grandkids. Then he bought me a cup of coffee.
Then I was back to the present day and my elderly friend was called into the office. I went back to my magazine.
Still, time stopped for a moment and that memory filled me with warmth.

A New Year

I can't believe it's 2008 already. I don't have a long list of resolutions per se, but there is a lot that I want to do this year. I have several books waiting for me like "The Art of Power" which was given to me by my friend Priscilla and two books by Pema Chodron "Start Where You Are" and "Don't Bite the Hook" - all of which I look forward to reading. Naturally, I want to be more disciplined about exercise - that's a perpetual resolution. I told my friend Peter the other day that I plan to practice meditation every day and take 15 minutes every afternoon to enjoy a cup of tea. He kind of laughed and said good luck with that. He's right, I'm afraid. I'll be really good about it for a week or so and then I'll get busy at work and won't take the time. Still, I'll give it a shot. I also plan to write more on this here blog. I've been playing around on another hosting site, too - it seems to have more flexibility when posting pictures - so I'll probably move over there. I'll post the link when I'm ready to unveil the new site.

Tom, being the adventurous one, wants to do some fun things this year. He wants to go whale watching and go up to the mountains so we can do some sledding with the boys. We also talked last night about signing the boys up for soccer or Tball this summer. They may need it more after they start school since I'm not sure how much physical education they'll get. In any case, they're ready for it this year.

Dean's resolutions are: he wants to go to the new park a lot and he wants to collect leaves.

Jack's resolutions are: he wants to collect rocks and crystals. So he can kill the bad guys.

Here's to a New Year!

Random Bits

When Jack rides on his scooter he peddles with his left foot and his right foot is on the scooter. Dean peddles with his right foot. It’s as automatic as the sunrise.

When dealing with a Lego kit, Jack wants to put it together exactly as directed. Dean claims he wants to help but really only wants to make off with little pieces to build his own thing. Once it’s done, Jack isn’t so interested in playing with it. For him, the entertainment is in the building. Dean wants to play with the completed project but will often take it apart and redesign it to fit his own vision.

As I have mentioned before, Jack loves to help me cook. Last evening, after I had chopped some fresh basil and fresh oregano Jack leaned down to smell the oregano and then got this beatific expression on his face, sighed and said, “mmmm, it’s minty”. I leaned down for a sniff and sure enough, it has a minty scent. Is it possible I have a budding chef on my hands? Oh, that would be amazing.

The other day Dean said to me, “I know how you can tell me and Jack apart. Jack’s eyes are like circles and mine are like almonds.” Really. Where does he get this stuff?

We had a babysitter last night so we could go to our friends’ house for a little after dinner party of appetizers and karaoke. I got forced into singing “Achy Breaky Heart” of all the ridiculous things. I love to sing but get embarrassed doing it in front of people I don’t know. It’s silly but I still care too much what other people think. It’s something else Jack and I have in common.

Dean has a remarkable singing voice, full of emotion and vibrato. I love listening to him sing but he gets self conscious if I ask him to sing and then he uses a baby voice or a silly voice. So, I just have to enjoy his singing when it comes naturally and make sure not to let him know I heard him. I vividly remember singing in the back seat when I was not much older than Dean - I’m sure it was loud and off key - and my dad turned the volume down suddenly and it was just my voice. I still remember how embarrassed I got. I don’t want Dean to feel like I’m trying to catch him or embarrass him. I just want him to sing. Not that I think my dad was trying to embarrass me - it’s just how I felt.

The boys are playing well together this morning. Finally. I love sitting here watching them with their heads bent toward each other, talking about how they’re going to play, what the game is. “And then, you pretend like you fell off the boat? And I’ll come to save you?” It’s so beautiful when it’s real.

A Long Overdue Christmas Post

Buche de Noel

Brotherly love

Ready, set, unwrap! Note the time in the upper left corner.

We cleaned up as we went otherwise you couldn't see the boys.

Leapstering.

Jack tells me that his favorite present was the Leapster and Dean's favorite is his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle "Donatello" and the weapons that accompanied it. His favorite weapon is the ninja stick. He demonstrated how it's used and in his sweet, sweet voice told me how you use it to "choke" someone. Nice.

The day began at roughly 6:01am. We forced them to wait until we at least got the coffee brewing. We just aren't civilized until we've had a cup 'o joe. But oh, it was magical. Their exclamations of surprise that Santa ate the cookies and drank the special Christmas milk (eggnog) and the reindeer ate the carrots! And all the presents! They covered the floor under the tree, blocking the path from the living room to the dining room.

After that, it was pretty much one big adrenaline rush that hasn't really ended. They haven't napped in days - except for Dean. He finally was so tired yesterday that he fell asleep in the shopping cart and slept for over 2 hours. They've been mostly at each other's throats with brief moments of affection and I am sort of looking forward to going back to work. Except, I don't really want to go back to work - I just want them to go back to school!!

And now, I'm thinking about 2008 and my hopes and goals for the year. But that will have to wait until later as the morning is getting away from me and I'm late for the shower.

Christmas Eve Conversation

Dean: Daddy, did you see this? (Shows him 2 feathers each with a heart strung onto them)
Daddy: No, they're very nice. Where did you get them?
Dean: I made them. One is for me and one is for Mommy. Do you know why it has a heart on it?
Daddy: No, why?
Dean: Because I love Mommy. She's all the Christmas I need.

Southern California Snow

First we dump the 'snow' on the boys.
Then they make snow angels.

Dean takes a break.

Flurries.

Jack takes a leap.

Spidey makes an unexpected appearance.

Spidey and Robin take a tumble.

Jack and Dean in the box.

Merry Christmas Eve!

Unexpected Gifts

I received a call today from a friend of mine whose son went to the daycare with the boys. She told me that her son wondered if we'd like to drop off Jack and Dean at their house to play for a couple of hours so Tom and I could have some alone time together.
Why, yes Frank thanks for asking!

So, we dropped off the boys and we went to the movies! We haven't been to a movie together since the late 1900s so this was a great gift. We saw "Sweeney Todd: Demon Barber of Fleet Street".

What's black and white and red all over? Sweeney Todd. I love me some Johnny Depp and he didn't disappoint. The production design was amazing - black, oily London filled with corrupt characters, the only color the splash of red when Todd works his blade on his unsuspecting customers. Helena Bonham Carter was equally good and Alan Rickman plays a perfect bad guy as the judge who ruins Todd's life.

Three hours later, we were picking up the boys (to their disappointment) and heading home. I'm glad we took them up on the offer and that all our shopping, cleaning and laundry was already done. I'm not very good at taking advantage of these kind of opportunities. Even today, my first impulse was to say no. But with no pressing chores nagging at me, what reason was there to say no?

As we drove to the theater, I felt almost giddy. I am so excited about Christmas this year, thrilled to be done with all the shopping and wrapping but looking forward to seeing the boys' faces as they open their gifts. I feel so lucky.

Helpers

Last night Jack came into the kitchen and offered to help me make dinner. As he scampered off to wash his hands, I thought about how he could help. When he returned, I told him he could slice the mushrooms. I cleaned them for him and he sliced them using one of these:





When he was done, he asked what else could he do? I told him he could chop the onion and garlic using one of these:







Then, I handed him the cleaned green beans and showed him how to trim them. He trimmed the ends and snapped them in half (except for the long ones, he wanted them to stay long). While he did that Dean stirred the onions and garlic in the pan. And added salt. Pinch after pinch of salt. Until I realized what he was doing and moved the salt. I must have caught him in time because it was fine but I wonder how much salt he would have added if I hadn't?

It was really nice having them help me. Jack asks a lot of questions "why do you pound the pork chops", "why do you put the onions in", "why do onions make you cry" but more amazingly, he remembers what I tell him. When Tom got home Jack told him what he helped with and explained that onions get really sweet when they cook for a long time. Dinner was delicious and we had great family time at the same time. By the way, my new favorite food is Israeli Couscous:




It's creamy and delicious, especially when cooked in chicken broth.

Mind over matter

Due to what I believe was a simple miscommunication, I found myself stuffing bottles of wine into festive bags for distribution to various staff members. The bottles weren't from me but a simple offer to help turned into something much bigger and, once offered, help isn't something to be rescinded. So, I stuffed while I quietly fumed. Every few moments I would remind myself that this is not a big deal, that I'm being a good team member, that good deeds do not go unnoticed. I maintained a calm serenity despite my initial frustration.

I returned to my desk many cases later and clicked on my Buddhist meditation of the day (kindly distributed to me by my home page Google). It said "Turn your mind away from things which are not permanent."

How perfect.

Cooker Girl

I love to cook and recently I've been recording cooking shows to give me new ideas. One of my favorites is Everyday Italian with Giada DeLaurentiis. Sometimes Jack watches with me. If you don't know who Giada is (where the heck have you been?), just google her.

Or - here's a picture:She's pretty. Sometimes Daddy likes to watch with me, too.

Anyway, so the other night Tom was tucking the boys into bed and he later told me about the following conversation that he had with Jack:

Daddy: You're so lucky to have such a nice mommy. She's nice and pretty and she's such a good cook.

Jack: Well, she's not the best cook in the whole world.

Daddy: Well, maybe not the best in the whole world but she's right up there.

Jack: She's not as good as cooker girl.


It's true, you know. I'm not as good as cooker girl.

Unforgettable

Back in September, Tom gave me a gift certificate good for 2 cooking classes at this quaint little place. My first class, on tamale making, was tonight. It was really fun and I came home with a dozen tamales. But that's not what this post is about.

This post is also not about driving home from tamale class in the rain through towns with which I am unfamiliar. Suffice to say, the older I get the more I want to stay within a small circle near my house. But, that's not what this is about.

Here is what this post is about. I walked through the door tonight, trying to be quiet so I didn't disturb the boys, and as I walked past their room, Tom gestured for me to go in. Dean looked at me and said in the sweetest voice, "I wrote your name" and handed an envelope to me with my name on it. "Open it", he said. Carefully, so as not to rip the paper, I opened the envelope. Inside, resting between the folds of blue felt was a pair of earrings, long ones made of a dozen sparkly hearts all lined up in a shimmery row. "Do you know why there are so many hearts", he asked. No, I said. "It's because that's how much I love you", he said.

I don't ever want to forget that moment.

NaBloPoMo Recap

So, yeah we couldn't get our wireless router to work on Friday night and that's why I had to phone in the haiku. But c'mon, at least it was a Haiku! I mean, doesn't that prove I was thinking?

I was disappointed. Not that I had anything particularly brilliant to write; I was probably just going to recap the month (yawn) and write about what I would do differently. Some of the other blogs I read had themes! Themes! That's smart. I wish I had done a theme. Like Twin Tuesday or Wonderful Wednesday? Or Thinking Thursday. Snapshot Saturday?

I had other big plans too like publishing a reading list but the only thing I managed was the link to Shelfari and then I couldn't even remember all the books that I've read. I also planned on doing a recipe each week but I didn't pick a day to do that so I had to do it randomly and then I'd forget.

I liked the challenge of having to post every day but I don't think the discipline made my posts any more creative or inspiring. Instead, I just kinda felt like I was late for my assignment and oh crap what am I going to do? I'll just toss this photo up on the web and write a cute tagline for it. Then I felt guilty.

That said, I'm glad I did it and I will sign up for it again next year with a little more structure.

Right now, I'm enjoying not having a deadline.