15 days

We are only 15 days away from the boys' 4th birthday. The next 15 days will be a walk down memory lane with some pictures and memories from the past 4 years. Four years ago today I was on my 39th day in the hospital and recovering from a wicked kidney infection that nearly resulted in the boys' very early birthday. I was 28 weeks and 2 days pregnant and getting weekly shots of epogen to boost my hg count (red blood cells) from a meager 7 to a healthy 12. I was still on magnesium sulfate but, thanks to my kidney infection, no longer had the dreaded catheter. I had just learned the day before that I was leaking some amniotic fluid so the babies were being monitored 24 hours a day instead of a couple of hours each day. I took every day as a blessing and spent my days talking on the phone, reading books or watching television. Tom visited me every night and had dinner with me. Despite my gestational diabetes label, I had a 1/2 gallon of ice cream in the freezer by the nurses station and almost every night Tom would bring me a small cup of it. It was Denali Bear Claw ice cream - dark chocolate with chocolate covered cashews and swirls of caramel. I remember it clearly. The boys moved a lot but their activity really spiked after I had my ice cream.




This picture was taken on September 15th, just 9 days before I went into the hospital. I have to look on my home computer for some belly photos from the hospital.












Here is an ultrasound done on July 23rd at around 15 weeks gestation. I think Jack is on the top and Dean is on the bottom. This was before any preterm labor and I was absolutely positively going to carry them to term.








This was a frequent occurrence after they nursed. I knew I should lay them down and either take a nap myself or do some housework but they were so soft and snuggly and warm. I often fell asleep like this. Jack is on the left with the pacifier. I always thought I had little skinny babies but they don't look so skinny in this photo. They were about 6 months old here. They still fall asleep on me but now they're almost 4.

I have warned them that when they turn 4 years old Daddy and I will not stay in their room with them until they fall asleep. Tom's pretty good about getting out before he falls asleep but not me. Half the time I'm falling asleep as I read their books to them. There goes Mom - noddin' off again. Part of me doesn't mind it so much (Dr. Ferber would be disgusted) but it's kind of nice to snuggle up with them and listen as they tell me all about their day. Jack's always the first to fall - Dean's like a dog, he has to flop around until he gets comfortable.

I miss them today.